Lolita Beginner Need-To-Knows and Must-Accepts

Being a Beginner Lolita can be quite hard. You have just fallen into the world of frills, bows and amazing dresses. And there is only one thing you want: shop, buy, purchase and as quickly as possible please!
And that is your first mistake.

I discovered Lolita one year ago and I too wanted to buy something immediately. If I had done this, I’m sure I would have become an Ita immediately. Luckily, I started researching first and I discovered that there are a few things beginning Lolita need to know and accept, even though it’s hard.

Lolita is expensive
This is the most important thing to accept for beginning Lolitas, and possibly the hardest. Lolita brands make lovely clothes, but they ask a lot in return. And the shipping costs aren’t exactly cheap either. The expenses are a big thing to accept, I know. But really, if other girls can somehow afford brandclothing, why can’t you? If you really want that certain dress or those amazing shoes, there must be a way to earn your money. Maybe this is a good reason to find a job?
There are a few shops that offer cheaper Lolitaclothes, such as Bodyline. The problem with Bodyline is that they sell Lolitaclothes, but also non-Lolitaclothes that look like Lolita. As a beginner, you are probably not able to tell good from bad. And that takes us to number two.

Do your research
You are about to dive into a fashionstyle that has a lot of rules. Lolita isn’t just throwing on a dress or skirt with a lot of lace, it’s a style that is about modesty and showing not too much skin. There are substyles with their own rules, accessories and sometimes even brands. If you do some research, you’ll find that the rules are quite difficult sometimes. But if you take your research really seriously (it is your new love, so why wouldn’t you?), you’ll discover that those rules only make your future outfit even more beautiful!
Lolita Fashion and The Lolita Handbook are very handy researchsites and an absolute must for every Lolita to read.
Of course, you can say: ‘I wear whatever I want, according to my own rules and no one can change that!’, and of course that’s true. Wear whatever you want, as long as you like it! But don’t call it Lolita if it’s not Lolita.

Avoid becoming an Ita
The previous step was about research and I cannot tell you how important that is. Really, you don’t want to look back in a few years and say: ‘What was I thinking back then?’ There are quite a few Lolitas who do.
Miss Caro-chan from F Yeah Lolita has written an amazing article
about Ita, which is really helpful.

Know your terms
The Lolitafashion is full of words. Make sure you know what people are talking about, so you won’t have to ask. This little dictionary might help you to do some of your homework.

Don't call it a costume
Lolita is a fashionstyle, and to some even a lifestyle. Lolita is not a costume. It might feel like you dress up and become someone else, like you are an actor who is about to enter the Lolitastage, and that’s fine. But don’t call it a costume, for it is insulting. Not only to other Lolitas, but to yourself too. You spent a lot of time on your appearance!


Becoming a Lolita takes time. If you do your research and accept the costs, you’ll discover something wonderful, sparkly, pink (or black, or any other colour of course) and poofy!
This is just a little list of things I have found out over the year. Maybe it is helpful for other new Lolitas who don’t want to wait like me.